Today marks the last day of being in Indiana. For the past 5-weeks, I’ve spent in Indiana doing a Youth Ministry (door-to-door colporteuring). This was something I’ve had people come up to me to tell me to do to help pay for school but I always declined the offer. It didn’t seem like something I was called to do. But right before school ended, while I was on my way to class, a classmate introduced me to a man who was the director for this program in Indiana. We had dinner with other students who did the program and they shared their stories. Not even a week passed and I said I would do the program.
Next thing I knew, my summer class ended and I was on a plane to Indiana and that’s when God went to work. Day one and tests and trials started. Phone charger went missing, my rain jacket forever ruined by the straps that held my books, rejects, etc… By the end of week one, I had a mindset that this wasn’t for me. I eventually broke down crying and looking for the next plane ticket back home. I just didn’t think I could do it. The director found me and let me vent, to help understand my situation, but then left to let me decide whether to leave or stay. When he left, it was just me, nature, and God. I spoke to God out loud and logically tried to reason why I should leave or stay. But then I realized, if God didn’t want me here, He wouldn’t have made it possible for me to come. There was a reason and purpose why I was here. I decided to stay after all, but to leave my faith in Him and allow Him to do His work.
But it wasn’t easy and there were many trials in the field. Door slams, rejections, numerous mosquito bites, difficult situations with certain people. I didn’t even think that people could be so cruel in this world. But I always had to remind myself to step back and just let God handle it. I needed to trust Him completely. But like I said, it wasn’t easy. There were even days where I didn’t even want to work but that was selfish of me. This work wasn’t for me; it was for Him.
God blessed continuously, even when I didn’t deserve it with my lack of faith. He did it as a reminder for me to never give up. To keep pushing until the end. To always have faith, trust, and a whole lot of patience.
By the end of the summer, I hit the goal I made for the amount to make for the summer, I received my first “dump bag” (when someone donates for all the books in the bag) on my last day, I met people with interesting stories who opened about their life and faith. Those stories I will never forget. Above all, I have learned to depend on God for everything. My faith has grown deeper than before. I pray more now than I even did in the past. I have a better understanding of people, along with growth in character. I have learned skills that will prepare me for the work field and in my personal life as well. I have a better relationship with my best friends, family, and with my heavenly Father.
A special thanks to (in no particular order):
Robin for letting me see what I look like when I make my many facial expressions and for being good with words. J.D for teaching me that hugs don’t have a time or limit. Madeline for her contagious laughter. Ronald, who always made me laugh whenever he used his ‘hispanic’ voice. Callie for being strong and for always having a perfect posture. Dina for her positive, bubbly, and spiritual vibes. Clayton for always pushing me to go outside of my comfort zone. Andres, for being an amazing leader who always said, “it’s not play time anymore” even though I couldn’t tell if he was or not. Darling for her love of fruit and making me want to be healthier. Alex, who was really smart and mature for his age. Doie who could’ve passed for my distant older sister. Gabby, who I could talk to about natural hair for hours. Josh, who didn’t speak much, but when he did, always made those around him laugh. Lal, who I always forgot was Asian. Kailyn, who always sang her heart out no matter her mood. Angella for her craziness that made others laugh. Lisamarie for her contagious, bubbly personality. Allistar, for helping me realize that we all have a past and we are not to assume nor judge before realizing that we’re all human. And lastly, Matt, who knew not only how to balance being a great boss, but a pastor, leader, mentor, and friend.